Mastering Likability Matters More Than You Might Know
Episode #1 of the course How to be popular and have everyone like you by Sofia Santiago
You’ve probably met someone who has that “X” factor that makes everyone like them. Call it likability, charisma, personal attractiveness, or “It,” but it seems that some have “It” and some don’t.
Talking about “It,” my friend Matt once asked his wife, “Do you think I have ‘It’?”
“Oh, yeah,” she said. “You’re full of ‘It’.”
Whether you have none of “It,” some of “It,” or are full of “It,” after taking this course, you’ll be the most likable you that you’ve ever been. Just practice the scientifically-proven techniques in this course to cultivate your personal magnetism.
Nice to Meet You
Hello there. My name is Sofia Santiago. I’m an expert in communication, a bestselling author, and the founder of Pathways Business Seminars. We help individuals like you develop their people skills. I’ve trained and coached employees of Microsoft, the US Air Force, Conoco, Hyatt, Purina, Graceland University, and many other organizations. At Pathways, we believe that, as Zig Ziglar said, “There’s only one thing worse than training employees and losing them, and it’s not training them and keeping them.” But that’s another story.
Enough about me—this course is all about you.
Why You Want to Be (More) Likable
The more likable someone is, the easier it is for them to land a new job or a new client, the more friends they have, and the more people gravitate toward them. I mean, if you were to hire someone to work with you, all other things being equal, would you pick someone you like or someone you don’t? The answer’s pretty obvious.
But you might be surprised to learn that besides being one of the most effective influence tactics, being likable is a skill that anybody can develop in order to propel their career and happiness.
At the end of the day, the quality of your life depends not only on what you do but also on what others do. No matter how smart you are, how many degrees you hold, or how hard you work, other people’s decisions will affect the likelihood of you getting what you want.
For instance, you might have found your ideal job, but if the decision makers don’t like you, they won’t hire you. You might want to date someone, but if they don’t like you, it won’t happen. You might have worked to get a contract for months, but if the client doesn’t like you, you won’t get it.
The effects of being likable can spread to all areas of your life.
These are a few examples of what science has proven:
• Likable candidates are more likely to get a second interview.
• Likable people get more recognition.
• How well people are liked by their boss influences whether they stay after a downsize.
• Likable people have stronger marriages.
• Likable people enjoy better health and are better equipped to overcome challenges.
• Companies looking for a new leader seek charisma above all else.
• When students like a course instructor, they’re more motivated and learn better.
Dr. Robert Cialdini, expert in persuasion and compliance, has summarized the benefits of being likable this way: “As a rule, we prefer to say yes to the requests of people we know and like.”
In other words, when people like you, they want to do what you want them to do. And who doesn’t want that? (Unless your thing is people not doing what you want, so when they don’t, they actually did do what you want …)
Psychologists haven’t agreed on a definition of likability, but they’re starting to understand what charisma is and just how far it can get you. That’s why this course doesn’t start with a dictionary definition. Instead, I’ll describe (and you’ll learn) the mindset and behavior of highly likable individuals.
Warning
This course won’t teach you to pretend to be likable. Truly likable people are authentic. If you pretend, you’ll be like a leopard who tried to sneak out of their enclosure by pretending to be a zebra—you’ll be spotted.
In the next three episodes, you’ll learn about the Golden Quadrant: why you want to be in it and how to get there. (Secret: Even though Going to the Golden Quadrant is the most powerful technique to be likable and popular, most people don’t know it!)
See you tomorrow.
Sofia
Recommended book
Influence: Science and Practice by Robert Cialdini
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